Chapter 75: Two Hearts Breaking

Ashley sat up on her bed as tears began to well up in her eyes. "Did I do the right thing Stace?" Her voice began to crack.

"I think so honey. Johnny and Dot have been back and forth for a while. With the baby coming it's time for him to decide how he really feels about her."

Tears were streaming down Ashley's face. "I know but why does it feel so damn wrong to let him go?"

"Cause you are thinking with your heart and not your head girl. He is in a big ol mess with Dot and you shouldn't be caught up in the middle of their shit storm."

"He told me I could be his child's second Mom!"

"Oh my God!" He said that?"

"Yes and I don't want to be a Mom of any kind. Especially to Dorothea Hurley's baby."

"I know exactly what you mean."

Richie broke the silence in the beach  apartment. "You okay?" He asked but he already knew the answer from the look on John's face.

"No Ash just broke up with me." He spoke softly and began to dab at the tears in his eyes with his fingertips.

"Sorry man. I was afraid she would react like that."

"I need to go over there. I have to make her understand that we can get through this."

"It's none of my business Johnny, but I think she just needs some time to process this. I mean it's a shock for me to know you are going to be a Dad. I can imagine how it is for her."

"I know, but I just can't leave it like this! I can't lose her!"

"I have to ask. How can you just take Dot's word for it? How do you know for sure it's your baby? I mean she did fuck around on you."

"She swears it's mine and that I'm the only one she didn't use protection with. And her due date matches to when we were together. Dot wouldn't lie about something this important."

"I would at least go with her to her next appointment and make sure what she is telling you is the truth about the due date and everything.

"Okay yeah, that's a good idea. I need to know for sure."

"So if you know for sure, is that going to change anything?"

John jumped up pacing the floor. "It's not going to make me fall back in love with her or want to be with her! If that's what your asking."

"I know you and her always fought a lot, but now she's going to be the Mother of your kid. Can you handle her being in your life all the time again?"

"Don't say that shit out loud! I don't want her in my life at all! Being with her is the biggest mistake I ever made! And now this mistake is coming back to bite me in the ass! But worst of all, it is going the cost me Ashley. I just don't know if I can live with that."

"You don't think, maybe she would get used to the idea?"

"No she told me she didn't want to have kids or get married or anything. I guess her childhood sucked and she blamed her parents.

"Well damn she's not like most chicks then, the first date and they are sizing you up for a husband."

"I know, that's why I can't lose her. She's not like anybody I have ever known. The truth is she is the only girl I could ever imagine myself settling down with."

"Damn and she's the one that's dead set against it!" He chuckled.  "You always did like a challenge though!" He continued to laugh.

"I've got to see her and talk to her face to face. She can't just blow me off! I won't let her."

"Well it's late. Let's just sleep on it tonight and I'll go over there with you tomorrow."

"Okay man. I'm wiped out." Richie sprawled out on the couch and John went in his room and laid down on his bed and closed his eyes  but all he could think of was Ashley's last words to him. "It can't end like this." He mumbled as he drifted off to sleep.

Ashley woke up to the morning sun shining through her window and stinging her eyes. For a moment she had forgotten what was hurting her heart so much.

Stacey walked in from the bathroom.

"Are you okay? You cried yourself to sleep last night."

"Yeah I guess so. It's just we went through hell and high water to be together and now it's over. It's just hard to believe."

"Well you are doing the right thing. That child deserves to have both parents and Johnny needs to step up and  be responsible."

Richie woke up to John angry that he couldn't find his keys. "Where the fuck are they?" He yelled tearing cushions off the love seat looking for them.

"Are you going over there now?"

"Yeah I ain't going to get many chances with her and I want her to know just how damn  sorry I am."

"I get it, but she may not be ready to hear it."

"She has to. Cause I can't lose her. She's every damn thing to me."

"Let's go but watch yourself around her brother and that asshole Jake. He'd love to fuck you up."

"Yeah I know. He better stay the fuck out of my damn face!"

They made their way down to the Mustang. They both jumped in and headed up Ocean Avenue. John went over everything in his head he wanted to say to her. He just hoped it was going to be enough to keep her.

He pulled on to Robinhood Drive and caught the tail lights of the Charger headed up the road. "There the assholes go!"

"Good maybe she's alone." Richie replied looking over toward Ashley's house.

John got out and walked up to the door. He started to knock but reached down and turned the knob. It was unlocked so he opened it and walked in with Richie.

Stacey walked out of the kitchen. "Nope you just turn the hell around and get out of here Johnny! She doesn't want to talk to you! This is what is best for now! So respect her wishes and leave her alone!"

"I can't do that Stacey! She means the world to me! This can't be the end!"

"Don't you understand how hard this is for her! It's breaking her heart!"

"Not half as much as it's breaking mine!"

"John!" Ashley called out stunned to see him standing in her living room.

"Baby please I have to talk to you!"

"I told you everything I needed to say last night. You have to put your baby and the child's mother first! I can't be in the middle of that!"

"What happened to you loved me and nothing could ever come between us?"

"I just never even thought about you getting somebody else pregnant! I have to draw the line somewhere! I'm sorry but my mind is made up!"

"I'll never get back with her! You can breakup with me but you can't remove yourself out of my heart!"

"But I can remove myself out of your life! Now get out!"

"You don't mean that!" He yelled. "You love me! I see it all over your face!"

"Just leave John! Please! I just can't do this!"

"I'll go, if you tell me you don't love me! I'll be out of here so fast your head will spin!"

"You know I can't say that!"

"Then how the hell can you push me away so damn easily? You know Dorothea doesn't mean shit to me!"

"She should John! She's the Mother of your child!"

"That wasn't my choice! I never wanted to knock her up! Hell having a kid with that bitch is the last damn thing I ever wanted! She lied to me and stopped taking her damn pills! It wasn't my fault!"

"Well it certainly isn't mine! I feel like I'm in the middle of the perfect little life you could be having with her!"

"No I love you damn it! Please don't let her come in between us! It's exactly what she wants!"

"I'm sorry, but I just can't see you right now."

"You're breaking up with me over this bullshit that isn't even my fault!" John yelled with hurt showing on his face.

"I'm just trying to do the right thing here! A child needs both of their parents and it just makes sense for y'all to try to work it out if you can."

"No it makes sense for me to be with the only girl I love and like it or not, that's you!"

"I just can't! Please go now!"

A familiar car driven by Dot drove down the street. Pausing in front of Ashley's house right beside John's car, before turning into the Bongiovi driveway.

John saw her through the window. His face  growing with rage. This was all her fault after all. John walked out the door with the others following behind him. He stomped over toward the car with Ashley watching from her driveway.

"What the fuck are you doing here!" He demanded to know.

"Look I'm not looking for trouble from you Johnny. I just came over to talk to your Mom."

"Well you are going to find plenty of trouble from me if you think you are busting up in my fucking house to tell Ma I knocked you up!"

"Would you stop calling it that? It sounds so cheap!"

"I call it like I see it!" He yelled with hatred in his eyes and heart.

"You never used to talk to me like that, before that bleach blonde whore moved in next door!" She pointed over at Ashley.

"Watch your fucking mouth! I only see one whore standing out here and it sure the fuck ain't Ashley!"

Everyone looked up when a loud voice called out from John's front porch. "Johnny!" Carol yelled standing there listening to the big uproar going on in her front yard. "What is going on out here!"

"Nothing Ma go back inside!" John yelled and looked back at Dot. "Get the fuck out of here!" He demanded through his gritted teeth.

Dot turned toward Carol with a smile. "Good morning Mrs. Bongiovi. I am so glad you could see me today."

"Well it sounded urgent on the phone. Come on in dear."

"Dot don't you fucking do this! I don't need her to find out like this!" John spoke in a breathy whisper but his anger was still very present.

"She has to know." She looked at John and started walking toward the house.

John ran up behind her. "Ma don't talk to her, she is just starting crap like usual!"

"Johnny calm down!" Carol insisted turning to Dot with a slight grin on her face. "How can I help you dear?"

"Well I just thought you needed to know." Dot started but John interrupted and blurted out, "nothing it's all lies Ma!"

"What in heavens name are you talking about?" Carol looked at both of them very confused.

"I wanted to be the one to tell you, that you are going to be a Grandmother next year." Dot smiled and looked over at Ashley who was still standing there watching and listening as tears rolled down her face.

"What?" Carol asked shocked. She sat down in a rocking chair like her wind had been knocked right out of her.

"Me and Johnny are going to be parents!" Dot exclaimed all smiles showing her total jubilation as John put his hand on his head and rolled his eyes in disgust.

He looked up to see Ashley's tear stained face as she turned around and walked back inside with Stacey.

Carol was stunned. "Johnny why didn't you tell me?" Carol asked still trying to let the news sink in.

"Ma I just found out and I wasn't sure how you would take it."

Carol smiled. "I'm going to be a Grandmother! I don't think there is a bad way to take that."

She stood up. "Come inside. We have a lot of things to talk about."

Carol opened up the door and John and Dorothea followed her inside.

"Here Dorothea let me fix you a drink." Carol disappeared into the kitchen and came back with a drink for her and one for John.

"Thanks." Dot accepted the drink and took a sip.

"Wow Johnny, a Daddy you are really going to be someone's Daddy!" Carol smiled looking at John but she sensed his unhappiness. "What's wrong dear?"

Dot blurted out. "Oh don't pay any attention to him. He's just upset that blondie kicked him to the curb when she found out I'm expecting a little baby Bongiovi." She placed her hand on her belly to showcase the little bump that was visible.

"Oh my Lord Dot you are already showing a little and you are absolutely glowing. Well it's for the best that John has decided to forget about Ashley and stand by the Mother of his child."

"I didn't decide anything. She broke it off with me. She couldn't handle someone else being pregnant with my baby! I didn't want to lose her, but somehow I just keep hurting her." He started running his hands through his hair.

"Look Johnny it is your responsibility to be there for Dot and the baby. You don't see it but you and Ashley are all wrong for each other and Dorothea being pregnant just proves that you two should be together.

"The hell it does!" John yelled out.

"Johnny you better watch your mouth!" Carol raised her voice and gave him a stern look.

She turned back to Dot. "Have you told your parents yet?"

"Yes they are still adjusting to the news." Dot replied.

"Well I will have to have them over for dinner sometime soon. Do you need anything? Johnny is working and he will buy whatever you need!"

"No I won't!" John turned to Dot. "Don't listen to her. You have your own job and until the baby actually gets here I ain't paying nothing!"

"Johnny that is very rude!" Carol gave John a harsh look to show her disapproval.

"It's okay Mrs. B I am working and looking for my own place to live. I just can't be at my parents house with a little one."

"Well that's just nonsense. Why can't you move in with Johnny?"

"Oh hell no! No damn way is she moving in my apartment!"

"No I really couldn't. It wouldn't look right us just shacking up with a baby on the way. My Father would kill me!" She laughed.

"Oh I'd probably kill you first! John blurted out as his mother rolled her eyes not thinking it was very funny.

"Well I am just loving the idea of being a Grandma already. We will have to plan a shower and pick out some names do you have any ideas for the name yet?"

"Well for a girl maybe Dorothy after my Mom or Stephanie after my Granma. Maybe Carol after you for her middle name and we can call her Dottie.  For a boy John Francis Bongiovi III and we will call him Johnny Jr. for sure.

"I love those names. What do you think Johnny?" Carol looked at John, who was off in his own little world thinking of Ashley.

"Huh?" He looked up.

"The names, do you like the baby names we were just discussing?" Carol rolled her eyes at him.

"I don't care what she names it."

"Gosh John it is a child not a puppy." Carol was surprised by his poor attitude.

"Well I really need to go. I have to get to work. Dot stood up. "I'm so glad you are happy for us."

"Of course dear let me walk you out. Are you coming Johnny?"

"Nah Dot knows where the door is." He said casually.

"God Dot I am sorry for his behavior. I would snatch a knot on his head if I thought it would do any good." She laughed.

"Oh I'm used to it." Dot sighed.

They walked outside together.

"Don't worry about Johnny. He will come around. He is going to be a great Daddy to this baby." Carol looked into her eyes and smiled. Dorothea tried to smile but looked kind of sad.

"Oh Dorothea what is wrong honey?"

"Johnny doesn't love me and he doesn't want this baby!"

"Don't say that. He still loves you, I am sure of it. He just needs a little reminding. You leave him up to me. He will be ready to be a Daddy when that baby gets here and I'll have him ready to be a good husband to you." Carol winked at her.

"Mrs. B he will never marry me. He practically hates me!"

"Don't you worry, I think I know my son and he will step up when it counts."

"God I hope so. I love Johnny and I really want us to be a family."

"And the three of you will be, I will make sure of it for my Grandchild."

Chapter 74: The Breakup

John rushed toward her. "Ashley! I'm so sorry! I was going to tell you soon! I swear!" He blurted out as his anger for Dot mixed with his fear of losing Ashley.

"Don't baby her ass Johnny! She needs to know the damn truth! That we are going to be parents together and she is in the damn way!" Dorothea yelled, hoping to get rid of her once and for all.

He turned back to her. "Shut the fuck up Dot!" Then he looked at Ashley. "I'm so sorry. This is not what I wanted! I didn't want you to find out like this! You've got to believe me! I wasn't trying to hide it from you! I was going to tell you! This doesn't change anything between you and me!"

Ashley was on the verge of tears. "Please  stop John. This changes everything."

"It doesn't have to! Come on let's go home together so we can talk this out. I love you Ashley. Dot doesn't mean anything to me! I swear!"

"That's a hell of a thing to say about your child's Mother!" Dot yelled looking at him like she could kill him.

John turned to her. "Would you shut the hell up! All of this is your fucking fault! If you had taken your damn pills like you were supposed to, we wouldn't be in this fucking mess!"

"How long have you known?" Ashley asked looking at John and then she glanced over at Dot, and just the sight of her made her feel sick to her stomach.

"She told me today, before the concert. She went to the doctor and based on her last period and due date, it looks like the kid is mine. I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have trusted her to take those damn birth control pills. What can I do to make this up to you. Nothing matters to me but you. I love you Ashley."

"But she has slept with other people! Bobby and Jake! And God only knows who else!"

"Hey you watch your damn mouth! I might be pregnant but I can still beat your skinny little ass with very little effort!" Dorothea mouthed off, not liking what was being said about her. "You really need to face the fact that the only guy I slept with without a condom was Johnny! So little miss priss, as you can plainly see Johnny and I will be a ready made family and I guess you just need to head on back to hickville and find you some cute little redneck to cozy up to!"

"Damn it Dot I told you to shut up! We are not a family I can't be with you! Kid or no kid, I love Ashley and she is the only one I want to be with!"

"What about it blondie? Do you still want to be with him? The father of my child? Can you live with the fact that he has obligations to me and our child?"

Ashley was still in shock and just stood there. So Dot continued.

"I love him I always have! You barely know him! The only thing you really have in common is between the sheets! If you were out of the picture we would get back together and be a happy family!"

"Ash don't listen to her. I can't be with her! I don't love her! I never did!"

"But you will love your child and every child needs their Father."

"What are you saying Ashley? You can help me take care of the baby you can be like a second Mom." He tried to explain.

"Oh hell no!  This bitch won't ever touch our child! Dorothea shouted at John and turned  toward Ashley giving her an evil eye.

Ashley's head felt like it was spinning.. "No John, I can't do that. I'm sorry but I told you I don't want to have any kids and I'm certainly not ready to be any sort of Mom to someone elses child."

"We can make this work!" He tried to get her to understand.

"No we can't. I've got to go." Ashley went in the building and he followed her.

She walked over to the waitress at the counter. "Mam can I use your phone?"

"Sure sweetie it's over there by the register."

"Who are you calling?" John demanded to know, but she wouldn't answer him. He felt an instant pounding in his brain and ran his hands through his hair hoping to relieve some of the pressure.

She dialed but didn't get an answer so she hung up and dialed a different number. Her voice was shaking. "Can you please come get me? I'm at the All American Diner."

She hung up . And tried to push past him.

"Where the hell are you going?"

"Please stop John everybody in here is staring at us!"

"I don't give a shit! I love you! Stop trying to push me away!"

She walked outside and he barreled out the door behind her.

"Who the fuck did you call Ashley?" He was getting angry that she wouldn't talk to him.

"Don't worry about me John. You have a lot of more important things to worry about."

"How can you say that? Nothing is more important than you!"

"I'm sorry! I just can't deal with it! Okay! The thought of you touching her makes me sick! And knowing y'all have a baby coming is just the last straw! How much shit do you really expect me to take John?"

"I'm sorry. I wish I could take it back. Hell I wish I hadn't ever met her. Ashley please I am begging you. Please don't leave me. I can't lose you." John pleaded with teary eyes.

A little while later the black Charger pulled up.

John looked up. "What the fuck Ash? You called Jake?"

"I couldn't get Stacey, so I called my brother."

 Ricky got out of the passenger side. "What's going on Ash? Did this asshole do something to you?"

"Fuck you man! John yelled out. Mad as hell she had called him. You're not leaving with them!" He glanced in her direction not taking his eyes off of Ricky.

"I've got to go John." She walked over by Ricky as the driver door opened. Jake got out with a can of beer in his hand.

"I told you, you'd fuck up Bongiovi!"

"Shut up Jake!" Ashley yelled walking over to her brother.

"Let's go Ricky!" She demanded, she had to get the hell away from John now.

"Ashley!" John called out, wanting to beg her to stay.

"I'll take good care of her! Jake laughed as Ricky and Ashley walked closer to the car.

"You better keep your fucking hands off of her you damn prick!" John yelled.

Richie walked outside. He heard Jake's car and came out to see what the commotion was.

Ashley slid in the backseat and Ricky climbed inside. Jake walked to the driver door and took a few sips of his beer and slung almost a full can at John and yelled. "Fuck you Bongiovi!" Then he jumped in and skidded out of the parking lot.

"Damn it!" John took his drenched shirt off and shook his head wildly trying to get some of the beer out of his hair.

"That fucking asshole man! I'm going over there!" John yelled walking toward the limo.

"Do what you want. But I would give her some space man." Richie hoped to reason with him.

"But she's over there with that prick!" John argued. His temper flaring.

"Her brother's there. I'll try to call Stacey to go over and make sure she's okay."

"Yeah do that and let me talk to her." John walked toward the diner and Dot was blocking the door.

"Get out of my damn way!" He yelled at her.

"Don't be mad at me because she made her choice. She doesn't love you! She doesn't want anything to do with our baby! Maybe she's in love with Jake! No I bet she goes back after Bret! Well they shouldn't have any trouble getting little miss innocent in the sack this time!" Dot laughed.

"You just need to shut up and get the fuck out of my face!" John's whole body jerked a little as he yelled because he was so pissed.

"Come on Dot! Grow the fuck up! If you're going to be a Mother, act like one!" Richie scolded her, but she couldn't seem to wipe the smirk off her face.

She moved aside and let John walk by. They walked over to the payphone and Richie dialed Stacey. After three rings she picked up.

"Hello." A groggy Stacey mumbled.

"Hey babe it's  Richie." He barely got it out when John grabbed the phone right out of his hand.

"Stacey it's Johnny! Listen I fucked up really bad and Ash just left the diner with Jake and Ricky. Can you go over there and check on her? Don't let her stay over there with that asshole!"

"What happened?" Stacey asked wondering what would send Ash to call Ricky and Jake."

"Well you're going to find out sooner or later. Dot's pregnant and .......................I'm the father." Even as he confessed this to her he still couldn't believe it.

"Oh my God! How the hell could you get Dot pregnant? What in the Sam Hill were you thinking? Did you not use protection with her?"

"She was always on the damn pill! How the hell was I supposed to know the bitch quit taking it?"

"That's the oldest trick in the book John to catch a man. Quit taking your pills and get pregnant! Voila instant family! Or they tell the guy, you don't need to wear a condom I can't have any children!"

"Damn I just wasn't thinking. I trusted that bitch!"

"Men need to wise up! Some chicks are looking for more than a good time! They are hunting for a husband or somebody to knock them up!"

"I guess I learned that shit the hard way." Please go over there! Make her come to your house and call me at the apartment. I have to talk to her. I just can't leave it like this."

"Johnny she's running. It's what she does. Don't spook her. She's like a deer. One sudden move and she's gone."

"But this is all my fault! And I love her. I can't let her go. Please see what you can do."

"Okay bye." Stacey hung up and got dressed as Jake's car pulled up. She walked outside and they were standing in the front yard.

"Where were you? I just tried to call you?" Ashley asked watching Stacey walk across the street.

"I was asleep. I heard Jake's car pull up. What's going on?"

"Her new boyfriend she's so crazy for has done gone and knocked up his ex!" Jake laughed.

"What?" Stacey tried to act shocked looking at Ashley.

"Yeah she went to the doctor and the due date is nine months exactly from when John slept with her at his apartment."

"But what about Jake! He plowed that damn field too!"

Ashley turned to Jake.

"Oh hell no! I wore a condom!" Jake shook his head back and forth. "Even though she told me I didn't have to, that she was on the pill. I ain't a dumbass like Bongiovi! Hell he even admits he didn't wear a rubber!"

"Only because his memory was messed up and he thought she was his girlfriend! She had always been on the pill and he never wore one with her." Ashley felt like she needed to explain it.

"Looks like that was a big mistake now!" Jake chuckled.

"Oh Ash I'm so sorry. What is John gonna do?"

"What can he do? Dot wants him back. She wants him to play daddy."

"He doesn't want to be with her! Right?" Stacey asked looking at Ashley.

"He said no. But it's his baby. A baby should be with it's father."

"So what are you doing here?"

"Dot was with him. I overheard them talking and him telling her he didn't want her to go out with some guy they know from school, that asked her out. She asked why and he told her because you're pregnant with my kid. He sounded jealous. Even though he denies it, he must have some sort of feelings for her."

"Damn Ash I'm sorry honey. Please cut your losses and let this be the last time you let him hurt you!"

"Tell her Stace! She needs to hear it!" Jake chimed in smoking a cigarette by the front door."

"Cause you're really one to talk! Damn it Jake, you hurt me more than anybody!" Ashley exclaimed, surprised by what he had just said.

"And that's how I know you are letting this dude walk all over you! You would have already kicked me in the balls a long time ago!"

"Jake just keep all your opinions to yourself I can't put up with you too!"

"Come inside Stace."

"Okay girl." They walked upstairs. "Why is my door open? I locked it when I left!" She hollered down the stairs.

Jake ran up the stairs. "I picked that lock. I like sleeping in your bed. I can smell that great way your hair smells all over your pillows."

"Stay out of my room! I'm not playing Jake!"

"You don't mean that. You have that look in your eyes." He smiled at her.

"Oh I do alright! The one that says you totally disgust me!"

"You know ever since you moved up here and started hanging with those long haired punks you have gotten really mouthy!"

"Up yours Jake! I'm just not taking your shit anymore!" She looked at him like she meant business.

"I've always loved that feistyness about you. It's always turned me on." He chuckled.

"Jake go on! We are trying to talk!" Stacey raised her voice glancing back at him.

"It's okay. I know what y'all are gonna talk about and don't worry, I'm up for threesome anytime y'all get ready." He laughed.

"You are always such a damn pervert Jake! It's a real turn off!" Ashley got up and started pushing him toward the door. "Bye bye see ya later!" He got to the door and wouldn't let her push him anymore.

"Go on Jake get out!"

"If you give me a kiss!" He stood there with a smirk looking at her.

"Hell no!" She  hollered out.

"You know you miss being with me." He smiled. Remember that last weekend we were together and stayed in that cabin up at Flint Creek?"

"Yeah I do. We had a good time that weekend but I haven't wanted you to kiss me in a month of Sundays and I certainly don't want it now so please leave so I can talk to Stacey."

"You know I still love you Ash?" Jake smiled looking at her.

"Okay can you do it from the hallway?"

"Damn you are cold. I'm starting to think you never gave a shit about me."

"Go with that thought." She pushed once more and he was in the hall and she closed the door and locked it.

"Finally some peace in my own damn house." She laid down on her bed.

"I don't know what I ever saw in Jake."

"Just forget him. What are you going to do about Johnny?"

"I don't know. He told me I could help him take care of the baby. I could be like a second mom!"

"Oh dang he really said that?"

"Yep and and I'm like thinking, oh hell no there's no way I could even be around a child of theirs that was conceived when me and John were still together. I guess that makes me sorrier than shit but hell I just can't do it!"

"Nope it doesn't. But it does give you your answer, cut him loose. He wants you to call him at the apartment."

"How do you know?"

"Richie was with him and they called me before I came over here. Call him."

"I can't! What should I say?"

"Say something like, I can't be with you when you've done gone off and gotten another chick pregnant! Goodbye and goodnight asshole!"

"God how am I going to do this? I love him so much. This is really tearing me up."

"Enough to help him raise his and Dorothea's baby?"

"Hell no I ain't raising any babies especially Dorothea Hurley's baby!"

"Well call him and tell him!"


Okay." She picked up the phone and hit speakerphone  and dialed John's number.

"Hello." John picked up on the first ring.

"Hey." Was all she could muster when she heard his super sexy voice answer on the other end of the line.

"Hey baby. I'm so glad you called. Are you over at Stacey's I was so worried about you, off with that asshole. Please come home."

"No John. I'm sorry but this just isn't going to work out."

"What? Wait what are you talking about?"

"Us this just isn't going to work. I can't be with you anymore. I just can't live like this.  We have to breakup." She got the words out quickly. Before she couldn't get them out at all.

"We can't end it like this Ashley! We love each other. Where are you? Your Dad's? I'm coming over there!"

"No John please don't rile up my brother and Jake."

"Ash this isn't right. I love you. I didn't know she was trying to get pregnant. Please don't leave me. At least come say it to my face." He sniffled into the phone wiping his eyes.

"No I can't." Her voice cracked a little.

"So you don't love me?"

"You know I do. This is so hard for me. I'm so sorry John, I wish I could except it but I just can't. I need time to be by myself and you need time to get ready to be a Daddy. Maybe you should try to work it out with Dorothea. A child needs both parents."

"No I won't be with the bitch that's ruining my life! Even if you breakup with me and hate me forever, I won't ever get back with her!"

"I don't hate you John. I'll always love you. I just can't be with you. I'm so sorry, but I've got to go."

"Ash wait!" He yelled into the phone and heard a click when she hung up.

He threw the phone across the room and sat down on the couch in shock. "Fuck my life!"

Chapter: 73 The Secret Is Out

John couldn't believe the nerve of this asshole. Who the fuck did he think he was.

"John please stop!" Ashley screamed out grabbing his arm. "Let's just leave!"

"You can take any of the limo's back to the Meadowlands to get your car." Eddie looked at Ashley but was secretly hoping to witness a fight. The guy in the suit looked like a punk to him.

Ashley pulled John's face to look at her. "Please come on, let's go."

"Okay let's go." He took her hand and they walked to the door.

"Hey hold up! I'll catch a ride with you guys!" Richie called out.

The three of them walked down and got in the first limo and Richie gave instructions to head back to the Meadowlands.

At first the ride back was fairly quiet. John was deep in thought, about life, Ashley, and the thought of maybe being a daddy.

Richie had thoughts of Stacey swirling around in his head. He wondered if it was too late to call her when he got home.

Ashley was tired. She leaned up against John's shoulder and drifted off to sleep.

"Who was that dude?" Richie whispered trying not to wake Ashley up.

"Just some asshole promising Ash a big modeling career and really just wanting to get in her pants!" He whispered back.

"I thought you were going to jump his shit for sure!" Richie laughed.

"Oh I was! Who fucking comes to a Van Halen party in a fucking three piece suit? Fucking punk!" John laughed.

"Are you going to see Southside at the Pony tomorrow night?" Richie asked knowing John couldn't stay away.

"Yep, I want him to meet Ash. He gave me so much grief about Dot. Always telling me to break up with her. I want to see what he thinks about her."

"I'm thinking about asking Stacey to go, but I'm not sure. She kept talking about Dalton and that is the kiss of death with me. I don't want to hear about your damn ex!"

John laughed. "Yeah no exes for me either."

"And hers is still in town, huh?"

"Yeah he's here, but if he knows What's good for him, he better stay the fuck away from her!" John blurted out, with a very serious look on his face.

"That dude needs to head south quick before he gets another Jersey beat down!" Richie laughed.

"Oh you know it!" John snickered a little too loudly.

Ashley woke up to their laughing. "What are y'all laughing about? Did I snore or something?"

"Hell no, I'd have to get rid of you if you snored!" John laughed. "It was nothing we were just laughing about Jake."

"I need to get some more of my stuff. My Uncle told Stacey, it looks like my Dad is coming home Monday. I can't face him John!"

"You don't have to baby. We'll go over there  with you tomorrow to get your stuff. And Jake better stay out of my damn way!" John replied. Still pissed at what he did to Ashley.

"Yeah man I'll go." Richie chimed in. "Ash do you think Stacey would want to go listen to Southside at the Stone Pony tomorrow night?"

"Probably, she loves live music. You're getting smitten with her Richie. I can tell. Y'all would make such a cute couple!" Ashley gushed.

"Oh come on! I'm just talking about a date! Nothing long term! Damn it!  Cool your matchmaking jets woman!"

"Well it's just you've both had a rough time lately and I think you would be good together. But you better not hurt her Richie! I'm serious! You don't want to tangle with me, if you do!"

"Dang I haven't done anything and you already want to hurt me. You really are getting like your boyfriend over here. You two are so violent!" Richie laughed.

John started smiling. "Yep she has a violent side for sure."

"Oh hush! You mister have the worse violent side I've seen and you're always getting into it with somebody and threatening to beat their ass!"

"It's true, I'll admit it and I know I ain't that big of a guy, but I got picked on a little in elementary school. Finally I had enough. I had broken my arm falling out of a tree and had a cast on it. This big guy was following me to the bus and he wanted to fight. He ran at me and I turned around and hit him with my cast and busted his mouth open. He never messed with me after that. I just decided, I might get my ass beat but I wasn't taking shit off of anybody ever again."

"Oh John why would anybody pick on you." Ashley questioned with a sad look on her face.

"Mostly because I was a little small for my age and the doctor gave me these dumb orthopedic shoes to wear until I was ten. They were supposed to help me walk better and I hated them!"

"Oh poor baby. They made fun of your shoes?"

"Yeah and a few days a week Ma had me lugging around a damn trumpet case everywhere. She signed me up for lessons across the street from the school."

"Aww I bet you were so cute!" Ashley grinned.

"Well I wanted to be tough, so I started growing my hair out and I took a lot of flack for it from the guys."

"What about the girls?" She asked.

John developed a toothy grin. "Oh they loved it. The first kiss I ever got, she put her hands through it and told me how much she loved my hair."

"How old were you?" She studied his face waiting for a reply.

"Eleven or twelve. We were at the ballfield. We had finished our practice and she had been hanging around. I knew she liked me so I kissed her."

"My God you got started early." She giggled. "So who taught you to french kiss?" She asked him wondering.

"An older girl. I was about twelve and she was an older sister of one of my friends. I stayed over at his house and we watched t.v. out in his garage. He got tired and went to bed and I stayed up and his sister, Mary Jane came home from a party. She was fifteen. We were watching something and she scooted over by me and asked if I knew how to french. I told her yeah, but I didn't know shit!" She started kissing me and stuck her tongue in my mouth. I just went with it. We kissed for a while and I got my first handful of boob." He laughed thinking back on how little he knew then.

"So who was your first kiss?" He asked very curious to what her reply would be.


"I was about thirteen and it was a guy at church camp."

"You went to church camp? John laughed and Richie joined in with him.

"Yeah my Mom made me go! There was this really cute boy. He was really dark and he had long feathered hair and his name was Tommy Bowers. Oh my God I was in love. We had a bonfire one night and he asked me to sit by him, so I did. The next thing I knew he kissed me. We were going together by the end of the night. He was from Georgia and we talked on the phone almost everyday for a while afterwards. He called me one night and told me he had met a girl he wanted to go with from his hometown. Victoria Parker, I'll never forget her name. I remember thinking, she must be the luckiest girl in the world. I was crushed. My heart broken into a million pieces." Ashley explained with some sadness still in her voice.

"His loss, I would have never picked any old Victoria Parker over you." John looked at her and it made her feel warm and fuzzy inside.

Ashley grinned. "Thanks I needed that. Your girlfriend must really be the luckiest girl in the world."

"Oh she is but I don't think she realizes just how lucky she makes me feel."

"Well does anybody want to hear about my first kiss?" Richie asked, ready to spill it.

"Sure go ahead." John replied with a little laugh.

"Well I was about thirteen and had the hots for this chick that came every Friday night to the bowling alley. I really wanted to impress her, so I begged my Mom to let me take bowling lessons. Two days a week for two months I took these damn lessons and entered a tournament and I came in first place. She was the trophy girl and when she gave me mine she smiled at me. We hung out together that night and when she went to leave I kissed her under the big bowling alley sign out front."

"Aww how sweet! What happened, did y'all get together?" Ashley was dying to know.

"Yeah eventually.  She was my first real girlfriend for a few months. We broke up for a while and got back together about a year later. We both lost our virginity in the back of my Dads old Nova at the drive in one night. God I haven't thought about Lisa in forever."

"Aww that's sad. She was your first love huh?" Ashley looked at him wondering what happened.

"She's the girl that taught me the ropes and  not to trust girls!" Richie blurted out laughing.

"She cheated on you?" Ashley questioned.

"No but she decided she liked a baseball player better than me."

"Aww I'm sorry Richie." She smiled at him hoping he wasn't going to dwell on a bad memory.

"Damn I know how that is man, I lost more than one girl to a damn football player!" John added.

"Well I played football. But this new kid moved here from Texas and he had that whole cowboy thing going on and she fell for it.

Ashley smiled. "Oh a southern cowboy. Well there ain't nothing quite like that." She giggled.

"Wait a minute! You have a thing for cowboys?" John asked knowing he had always wanted to be one.

"What girl doesn't? I mean those tight jeans and boots and oh God the hat!" She giggled.

"Well I can't tell if you playing or not."

"I'm not. I've always had a thing for cowboys."

"Well I've got a cowboy hat you know." He said matter of factly.

"Yeah I know." She grinned.

"And you see I'm wearing my boots."

"Yeah I see." She glanced down with the street lights lighting the interior of the car.

"And these jeans couldn't get any freaking tighter." He tried to grab a hold of the material and it wouldn't budge.

"Oh I love those jeans on you." She glanced down at them.

 Then she slowly ran her hand lightly across his thigh.

"I just never thought of cowboys coming from New Jersey. I haven't seen very many horses here. Cowboys have to ride a horse!" She giggled a little.

"Shit yeah baby. Jersey has horses. My Grandma has some horses and I am going to take you back there just to prove I can ride."

"Oh I believe you."

"Tell her Richie!" He insisted.

"Well I've seen a horse throw him off at his Grandma's house!" Richie laughed.

"That was one time! Tell her about the time we rode the horses up the highway!"

"Well I rode mine but Johnny was barely hanging on to his." Richie chuckled.

"Oh no!" Ashley giggled.

"Come on man quit shitting her, you're making me look bad!" John laughed.

"Yeah yeah Ash in all seriousness Johnny thinks he can ride." Richie laughed.

John was starting to get agitated. "You know I can ride! How about I stick this boot up your ass?" He said smiling but only half kidding.

"We are just playing with you John. You put that hat of yours on and you can be my cowboy anytime."

Richie looked out the window. "We're almost there."

"Yeah." John replied looking up.

"Are you guys going home?" Richie asked.

"Yep I'm wiped out. We'll be at the Pony tomorrow night."

"We will?" Ashley asked confused.

"Yeah Southside is playing there. I never miss any of his shows."

"But Dorothea and all her little friends hang out there!" Ashley exclaimed dreading the thought of them running into her again.

"So that won't stop me from seeing Southside and the Jukes! Just ignore her. That's what I'm going to do."

"Okay but I hate being anywhere near her. She always gives me that dirty look of hers."

"Just don't let her get to you. She lives for shit like that. She would love nothing more than to come between us. If we don't let her get under our skin, eventually she will just leave us alone."

"Okay but I hope you're right."

John told the driver to let them out by his car. Richie was parked close by and got out also.

"Grab my poster John." Ashley instructed as she exited the limo.

"Here baby." Now you can look up at this poster on the wall and fantasize about Eddie while we are in bed together." He laughed.

"What makes you think I haven't already been doing that?" She laughed.

"Aww damn! You better not have!" He chuckled. "Or I'll have to bend you over my knee."

"Promises promises. She laughed.

"Let's stop at the diner, I'm starving." John looked at both of them as he dug for his keys.

"Me too." Richie mumbled looking over to find his car.

"Y'all are always starving. The way y'all eat you should be five hundred pounds a piece. Ashley giggled.

"That's my goal baby. To gain a lot of weight and they will start calling me Fat Johnny!" He laughed.

"Oh no you're not!" She grabbed his waist and turned him around.

"Why? You don't love Fat Johnny?" He asked.

"No I'm not gonna be with Fat Johnny!" She giggled.

"Well that ain't fair that you would kick me to the curb because I was fat!" He laughed.

"Oh I would still love you! No matter what you did. You know that."

"Good cause I am sure I would love you no matter what." He leaned down a gave her a gentle kiss on the lips.

"And that's my cue. See you two at the dinner." Richie walked away smiling.

John was studying her face.

"What?" She asked knowing he was thinking about something.

"Do you wish you could of been with Eddie tonight? I know you have had a crush on him and it was obvious he had a thing for you?" He looked into her eyes wanting a truthful answer.

"Gosh being with Eddie was just a fantasy. Every girl dreams of being at the concert and the hot guy in the band notices you and calls you on stage or backstage like tonight."

"Was your fantasy to sleep with him? 'Cause I guess I got in the way of you accomplishing that."


"You know me John Bongiovi. I have only slept with one guy my entire life. And I am absolutely crazy about him. Do you really think I could go back stage and sleep with Eddie Van Halen?"

"Nah not when you have Fat Johnny here waiting for you." He laughed.

She smiled. "I love you John.  But even if I hadn't been with you. Nothing would have happened between me and Eddie. He's a nice guy and all. But I couldn't be with him like that. I'm not in love with him and it wouldn't mean anything."

"What if he wanted to make you his girl?" He asked really wanting to know.

"No, he's gone way too much and there are way too many girls chasing after him! I'd be too jealous and worried all the time! I know I couldn't trust him. I couldn't be his girlfriend!"

"Wait what if I go on the road? Are you saying you couldn't be with me? Would you break up with me Ashley?"

"John I don't even want to think about that." She turned away.

He grabbed her face and gently pulled it back to him. "Answer me. Is that your plan? To break up with me if I go out on the road?"

"I don't have a plan, but I don't want to be in your way. I don't want you to feel like you are tied down to me."

"God Ashley you would not be in my way! And I want to be tied down to you!"

"I know what happens on the road and I don't want you sneaking behind my back lying to me and sleeping with sleazy girls!"

"Is that what you're telling me? That you would leave me, if I get a record deal and started touring? Is that why you wouldn't be with Bret, because he was out on the road?" He started getting upset.

"Just stop John!"

"No you answer me! Are you breaking up with my ass if I get signed?" He grabbed her shoulders and pulled her closer.

She looked into his eyes. "I don't know. I love you, but I don't want to hold you back from living out your dream."

"God Ashley. There are two things that I am sure of in this world. That I am going to be a famous rockstar someday and that I want to be with you!  So please don't tell me that finally making my dream come true is going to cost me the only girl I have ever really been in love with!"

"I'm sorry. That's why I couldn't be with Bret. He had a big tour lined up and all the girls were crazy about him. I knew it just wouldn't work."

"I'm not Bret! And our relationship is is way more advanced! You never slept with him! Ashley I love you! I know I couldn't live without you! And the thought of you breaking up with me and being back here free to see other people and maybe sleep with somebody else would drive me insane!"

"You would have all those loose girls on the road to keep you company John."

"Sure that was a big deal to me when I started playing. I wanted the girls to be impressed. And sure I have gotten way more girls because I am a musician than I would have if I wasn't! But I can honestly tell you that when we got together, I didn't give a shit about any of that anymore. You are the only girl I want. You are the only girl I need. I can't live without you. Ashley don't you know how much I love you?"

"Yes and love you too. But I don't know if I could sit here waiting for you."

"Let's just drop it for now. It ain't like I've got record companies fighting over me and I ain't going anywhere anytime soon." He half heartedly smiled trying to put her mind at ease.

"They'll be fighting over you someday. I'm sure of it." Ashley tried to smile but in her heart she knew it was only a matter of time.

"Come on Richie's waiting for us." They hopped in the car and drove over to the dinner.

Richie was sitting in his Camaro smoking a cigarette. "I wondered if you had changed your mind about eating."

"No we had to clear the air about something. That's all."

"Just order me a coke. I'm not that hungry. I'm going to the bathroom." Ashley looked at John and started walking to the restaurant.

"Ash wait! You're not just getting a coke you are ordering some damn food! If you don't eat it all you can take it home for later." John yelled out worried about her not eating.

"Okay John calm down! Order me some pancakes and if they have bluberries add them."

"Okay." John replied as she walked into the building.

"Ashley!" She heard her name and turned around as soon as she entered the building.

"Oh hey Shelly." She greeted a girl from work.

"How was the concert?"

"It was great. We had a very good time."

"I'm just waiting for my sister to get off. She needed a ride."

"I'm headed to the bathroom girl. I'll see you Monday."

"Okay bye."


She was in the bathroom stall when she heard the door open and a couple of girls enter the restroom. She thought one voice sounded familiar.

"Oh my God it's Richie and Johnny! What are you going to do? Erica asked Dorothea.

"I'm going over there! That bitch isn't with him and I want to rub it in his face. I know he can tell. I want him to know about my date with Paul."

"Do you think he will really be jealous?"

"Of course!" He's very territorial and he's never liked Paul. He was always very jealous of him in high school. The thought of us going out with him will eat him alive!"

"Okay but don't be disappointed if he doesn't care. You know he's all hung up on her."

"Fuck her. She's not giving him what I am! And he will be back with me soon enough."

"If you say so Dot, but I'm not sure."

They walked out of the bathroom.

"What the hell was that about?" Ashley thought as she walked out of the stall.

She washed her hands and peeked out the door to see Dot standing at John's table and him turning angry yelling at her about something.

"Did the little Princess leave you high and dry for Eddie Van Halen?" She laughed.

"Hell no we all went and partied with the band! She was with me not Eddie!"

"Well I wonder if she will still be with you, if I tell her about this little bun in my oven?"

"You better get the fuck out of here with that shit Dot! I'm warning you! I will tell her my damn self!"

"Well you haven't told her yet and my patience is wearing thin. But my belly is getting bigger everyday and I'm sure even though she is a blonde she will figure it out!" She grinned.

"Don't act like Ashley is dumb or something. She is very smart! Look go the fuck on! She will be back any minute!"

Ashley walked up. "John." She looked at him and then Dorothea.

"Baby here sit down. Dot was just leaving."

"Hi Ashley don't you look special tonight. What about me? Do you notice anything new about me?"

"Nope you look exactly the same to me." She sat down and mumbled. "A bitch." Ashley mumbled under her breath.

John heard it and laughed.

Dorothea looked at Ashley. "What did you just say?"

John looked up at her. "Look Dot we are trying to eat here can you take all your drama somewhere else please?" John looked at her and she could tell he was getting pissed.

"I was just trying to be friendly to your little flavor of the month here!"

"We've been together a lot longer than that so come on and give it a rest!"

"It's late and I have got to get my rest. I've got a big date tomorrow night." Dot cut her eyes at John.

"Well good for you. I'm so happy for you. I hope it all works out." John grinned and it cut her to the core knowing he didn't give a damn what she did.

"Yeah it's with your old buddy from school!" Dot smiled.

"Really who Bobby?" He asked wondering who else of his friends would date her.

"No, Paul Taylor!" She smiled and watched John's eyes instantly flame with jealousy.

"Taylor ain't no damn Buddy of mine!"

"No I guess not, he was more of a jock. Star quarterback, pitcher for the baseball team, and captain of the wrestling team. And you did what? Oh yeah you played in the marching band for a while?" Dot laughed really rubbing it in.

"Can I see you outside?" John looked at her and gritted his teeth.

"I don't know I really need to be going." She looked at him the smirk growing on her face.

John stood up. "I'll be right back Ash." He grabbed Dot by the elbow and hauled her outside.

"Get your damn hand off of me." She gave him an almost evil glare. They got outside and he let her go beside his car.

"Don't you grab me again! You could have hurt the baby!"

"I hardly think you walking outside is going to hurt your baby Dot!"

"Our baby Johnny! This is your child too."

"Look I need you to stop with this shit! If there's a blood test or something I can take later I will. But you can't keep showing up in my life! You are really going to fuck things up royally for me!"

She smiled and put her hand on her belly. "We are giving you your space. That's why I excepted the date with Paul."

"Yeah what the fuck is up with that? Does he know your pregnant?"

"No but if there is a reason to tell him I will."

"Like what? Why the fuck would he need to know?"

"I don't know, if we want to become intimate together, he should know."

"Are you serious? Your first fucking date with him and you are already considering sleeping with that asshole?"

"Why do you care? You told me to move on remember? And you are probably sleeping with your little blonde tramp ever night!"

"What we do is our damn business! She is not a tramp I am the only dude she has ever been with!"

"So she says!" Dot snapped back getting a little angry.

"You don't think I can tell if someone is a virgin or not? How damn dumb do you think I am? Of course she was!"

"I really don't give a shit about her! I have always had a crush on Paul! Ever since the first day of high school!" She smiled.

"Oh that's funny 'cause back in high school when we were together you told me you couldn't stand the dude! I knew you were fucking lying!" He yelled.

"You were so jealous of him I just didn't want to hear it anymore!"

"Are you going to fuck him?" John asked demanding an answer.

"Why does it matter to you? You don't want me anymore!" Dot yelled her emotions going out of control.

"It just does! Okay!" John answered.

"Why?" Dot asked determined to get to the truth.

"Because."

"Because why Johnny?" She asked again.

"Because you're pregnant with my damn kid! That's why! Okay?"  John yelled hoping to talk her out this damn date.

The wind was picking up a little and something blowing behind John caught Dot's eye. She smiled a very big satisfying grin as she realized who was standing there.

"Well I guess the secret is out now!" Dot laughed looking at John.

John could tell  by the exprssion on her face somebody was there. He developed a big lump in his throat and could barely swallow or breathe as he turned around to face a hurt pair of blue eyes staring back at him.

Chapter 72: Up Close And Personal

John heard the door open and close and looked over and Patty was gone. He grabbed his underwear and slid them on followed by his jeans. He handed Ashley her clothes. "Here you go baby."

"Thanks." She took her shirt and sat down on the couch feeling a little bit woozy.

"Are you okay?" He slid his shirt back on and sat down beside her.

She replied. "Yeah. I just drank a lot of champagne. I'll be okay." She breathed in a deep breath and let it out slowly.

"Can I get you something? Maybe some water?"

"Yeah please." She went to put her shirt on and noticed some stains on it. "There's something sticky all over my shirt." She held it up.

"What is that?" He looked over and saw a spilled mixed drink on the ground. "That's what it is, It must of landed in that red shit over there."

"Damn it." She mumbled.

"Don't worry,  nobody will even notice up against your cleavage babe." He grinned.

"I will and I love this shirt and this red shit probably ain't gonna come out!" She slid the stained shirt on and pulled her pants up and laid back on the outdoor couch trying to let her stomach settle.

John put his shoes back on. "I'll be right back." He walked into the penthouse to get her water. As soon as he was inside he spotted Patty.

She saw him coming and hurried in the other direction.

"Patty!" He called after her and made his way toward her with quick angry steps.

She stopped in mid-stride and turned around. He grabbed her by the arm and backed her over to a nearby corner.

"What the fuck were you doing outside watching us?"

"Look I'm sorry. I went out for a smoke and I just couldn't believe what I was seeing. It caught me off guard. I didn't mean to interrupt the two of you.

"So you just stood there watching me fuck my girlfriend! That's fucked up Patty!"

"I wasn't trying to watch! But you were so into it. It was so different from when we used to do it together. You were so loving and caring with her. I was just curious."


"Curious about what Patty? What positions me and Ashley fuck in?" He yelled.

"No just how you are with her! How much you seem to care about her. I never felt like you cared that deeply about me." She tried to explain.

"I was crazy about you Patty! You cheated on me and ruined it! Remember?"

"Just forget it!" She turned away.

"Whatever I've got to go, Ash is sick and I've got to get back to her!" He walked over to the bar and got some water for her.

Outside Ashley was laying down and a little out of it. She felt a hand touch her her shoulder and travel across her chest to her exposed belly and assumed it was John. "John I feel sick." She mumbled curled up on the couch.

 John walked out on the balcony and he saw some guy in a suit standing next to Ashley and it looked like his hand was on her.

"Hey what the fuck are you doing?" John yelled from the door.

The guy threw up his hands. "Nothing man. "She was calling out for somebody named  John. I was just making sure she was okay."

"Well I'm John and you can go the fuck on somewhere!" He yelled moving closer to him.

"Okay man! Take it easy!" He walked away and went back inside.

"Ash are you okay?"

"Yeah I thought that guy was you."

"Did he touch you?"

"No I don't think so."

"Here sit up and drink some of this water."

He helped her up and she drank some water. "Thanks, I'm sorry I'm just bringing you down tonight."

"You're not bringing me down. I'm sorry you're feeling bad. Do you want me to take you home?"

"No I'll feel better in a minute. Let's stay."

"If you're sure?"

"Yeah I want you to have fun."

He started smiling at her.

"What?" She forced a hint of a smile back at him.

"There is nothing more fun than what we just did."

"Oh John." She grinned and shook her head.

The door swung open and he looked back to see Richie.

"Is this a private party out here or can anybody join? He grinned walking over holding a beer.

"Not anymore." John chuckled. Ash is sick."

"I'll be fine." She looked at John then Richie.

"You look bad baby." John caressed her shoulder.

"You look a little out of it darlin." Richie smiled at her and sat beside John.

"Gee thanks y'all sure know how to make a girl feel beautiful." She stood up. "I'll be back, I'm going to the bathroom." She picked up her purse and staggered a little to the door. Ashley stopped at the bar for some more water. She drank a few sips and hurried to the bathroom. She propped herself up on the sink feeling horrible. Amber walked in looking like a million bucks.

"Oh honey are you okay?"  She sympathetically asked.

"No I think I'm going to toss my cookies any second."

"Hold on I have something that will ease your stomach." She sat her purse on the counter and dug through it and came out with a little bottle of pills. "Here take two, no take three of these and you will feel so much better. I promise."

Back outside on the balcony. "Did she drink too much?" Richie asked lighting up a cigarette.

"Yeah and she hardly ever eats anything so it messed her up quick. It's probably a good thing. We were out here by ourselves having sex and I looked up and Patty is standing over there by the door watching us!"

"Damn! Richie laughed. "She was watching you two fuck?"

"Yep." John nodded.

"What did you do?"

"Ash didn't notice her and I wasn't about to let her kill the mood, so I just kept going!"

"Damn Patty must be kinky man!" Richie laughed.

"I followed her inside and called her out on it. She made up some lame excuse for why she was out here, but I know it was bullshit! I don't want Ash to know. She didn't want to do it out here anyway and she'll be pissed!"

"I won't say nothing. Do you need to take Ashley home?"

"I asked her, she said she would be fine."

"Well I guess she knows."

"Let's go check on her." John picked up his cigarettes.

"Okay." Richie put his cigarette out and stood up.

Ashley took three of the tablets and swallowed them down. She picked up her water and drank a few sips. "Thanks, what is that stuff?"

"Something for nausea, I got them from my doctor. I get motion sickness sometimes and they always help me pretty quick."

"God I hope they help me. Thanks so much Amber. I usually don't get this sick on champagne."

"Well sometimes I do at the parties they give us after our modeling gigs and this stuff helps me."

"Wow I feel better. That stuff is awesome!"

"I told you and you look so much better. Let's touch up your makeup. There's somebody here I want you to meet."

"Oh my God who?"

"He's a promoter and a photographer. He got me started in the business and he asked me about you."

"Me? I told you Amber, modeling just isn't for me. I would be too nervous with so many eyes on me picking apart my flaws. And I've got this red shit spilled all over my shirt!"

"Well I think you are crazy! If you have any flaws, I sure don't see them. I've got an extra dress in my bag you can wear, it will hug your curves just perfectly!" She giggled.

Ashley pulled her hair up and turned around. "These are some of the flaws I'm talking about."  Amber looked at her scars on her neck going down her back into her shirt.

"What happened to you Ashley?"

"My ex pushed me down some stairs. So see I just wouldn't feel comfortable. I appreciate you trying to help me but, it really is not for me."

"Oh my God honey, I am so sorry!" She gave her a little hug.

"Listen they have some treatments that can get rid of your scars. My roommate was in a car wreck and she had scars on her face and now they're gone!"

"I can't afford it. It probably costs a lot of money."

"Her agent paid for it. They just took a bigger cut of her salary, but her scars are totally gone. Please just meet him! You don't have to decide tonight!" She dug in her bag. "Look here's the dress, try it on!"

"Okay." Ashley reluctantly took her clothes off and put it on. Very pleased with what she saw in the mirror. "Damn it does look good! John and Richie were just teasing me, telling me I look like shit tonight."

"Well I can fix that!" Amber dug some makeup out of her purse and began touching up Ashley's face and trying to fix her hair.

John knocked on the door. "Ash are you okay in there?" He asked propping himself up on the door.

"Yeah I'm good. I'll be out in a minute."

Steven entered the room with a few guys following him. "Okay you bunch of pussies, I've got a game you'll all be too chicken shit to play!" He announced walking over to them.

"I'll play!" Richie exclaimed with a grin.

"Hold up Richie, you better ask this crazy fucker what game he's playing first! Could be any damn thing! This dude is out of his fucking mind!" Eddie warned walking over from the bar.

"I'll play too!" A drunken John laughed. "I ain't no pussy, so what are we playing?" He asked, grabbing an unopened beer off of the table. As Steven unhooked a knife from his side.

"Five finger fillet and you can't back out now or I'll just stab your ass anyway." He laughed.

"What the hell is five finger fillet? John asked smiling at Richie.

"I think it's what we call stabscotch!" Richie laughed.

"Fuck! Is it where you stab all the way around somebody's open hand?" John asked.

"Yep that would be it!" Steven grinned.

"I'll play but you better not stab my fucking hand though! My voice is still fucked up and playing guitar is all I got right now!" John chuckled as he grabbed for Steven's knife. "Let me see how damn sharp it is." He rubbed his finger across the tip of the blade and it grazed him a little.

"Let me see it!" Richie grabbed it from him.

Steven laughed. "Come on let's play! Which one of you is going first?"

"I will!" Richie spread his hand out on the table cool and collected but inside he was nervous as hell knowing how drunk Steven was and how much it hurt to be stabbed in the hand.

Steven was drunk as shit, but could master this in his sleep, he had done this so many times. He picked up his knife and methodically stabbed in between all of Richie's fingers with precision.

"Woah! Damn! You didn't stab my ass!" Richie shouted out with jubilation, echoed by cheers of the small crowd gathered watching them.

"Okay Bongiovi, you're next!" Steven laughed grabbing for John's hand.

"Okay damn! Let me take my jacket off first!" John laughed throwing it over on a chair. He turned around and put his hand on the table opened as wide as he could.

Steven picked up his knife and began to stab between John's fingers as John held his breath. So damn relieved when he pierced through the tabletop each time instead of his hand.

John grinned. "Damn it son you cut it close a couple of times!"

"Bullshit! It was perfect and you know it was!" Steven laughed.

"Okay it's my turn to do you!" John yelled out. Ready for a little revenge.

"Nope it's mine!" Richie grabbed for the knife, but Steven put it behind his back.

"Hell naw! I ain't trusting either of you assholes with my trigger fingers!" Steven laughed.

"Oh okay, I see you are the pussy you accused us of being! It's okay, maybe the word won't get out to all your fans!" John laughed and so did Richie.

"Hold up I ain't no pussy! Let's go! But I didn't stab your ass so you better not stab me!" Steven held his long slender fingers wide open as a drunken John picked up the knife. John took a deep breath and stabbed beside each of Steven's fingers only coming close to cutting him once.

"Damn it! Your drunk ass almost cut me!" Steven hollered out with a chuckle.

John laughed. "You've still got ten fingers!"

"Okay Ed your turn!" Steven put his arm around him.

"Hell no, I need all my damn fingers!" He chuckled. "I will leave all that to you psychos!"

"Johnny!" Someone called out and John turned his head.

"Eric hey man." John replied to the drummer from his band.

"Damn how are you man? I heard what happened. I hope you are leaving that damn chick alone before her Dad kills you!" He laughed.

"Nope I ain't, she moved in with me."

"Damn it Johnny! So your voice is still fucked up. I hoped it would be getting better. Sebastian is a real asshole to play with."

"Well just grin and bear it! I've got to go to see my doctor on Tuesday. Hope he can tell me some sort of time frame that I will get my voice back all the way."

That was freaking cool what you guys just did with the knife. How did you get so damn good at it?"

Practice makes perfect and I stabbed Richie's ass a few times. Show him the scars man!"

Richie showed him a couple of scars on his fingers.

"Damn! Remind me never to play that with your drunk ass!"

Ashley walked out of the bathroom with Amber and walked over to John. "Do I look better now?"

"Damn baby you look hot as hell! Where did you get that dress?"

"Amber, she had it in her bag. She's letting me borrow it because of that red crap that is  all over my clothes."

"Yep now she's too hot for you Johnny!" Amber looked at them and started laughing.

"Oh she's always been too hot for me!" He chuckled back at her.

"Oh Lord!" Ashley smiled.

"Are you feeling better baby?"

"Yeah I am, thanks."

"Eric I don't think you've met, this is my girl, Ashley."

"Hey nice to meet you."

"You too." He smiled and turned to John and  whispered. "I see why you don't want give her up."

John grinned. "You don't know the half of it man."

"What are y'all whispering about?" Ashley cut John a look.

"Nothing baby just music stuff, you know."

"Uh huh sure." She rolled her eyes.

Eddie picked up a guitar and started playing a song from the new album. John and Richie grabbed a couple more guitars that were on stands by the window. John knew the album by heart so it was easy for him to keep up.

"Damn you two are pretty good." Eddie smiled, pausing to think of another tune to play.

"Thanks." John grinned ear to ear. He was thrilled to hear Eddie say he was good.

"Are you guys in the same band?" Eddie asked looking at John.

"No my band is The Rest and he's in Message."

"I've heard of Message." Eddie acknowledged digging for another pick in a box.

"Really? Richie smiled. Thinking how cool it was that Eddie Van Halen knew about his band.

John was a little disappointed he hadn't heard of his band. They began to play one one song together.

"There he is Ashley." She turned to see the guy she thought was John, out on the balcony earlier.

"Christopher!" Amber called out and he walked over.

"This is Ashley." She pointed at her. "And this here is Chrisopher Marchelli , my favorite photographer." She smiled flirting a little bit, smiling at him.


"We sort of met on the balcony." Ashley had a light grin on her face.

"I hope I didn't frighten you. I really was checking to see if you were okay."

"I feel better now, thanks."

"Wow you two make a really cute couple!" Amber giggled as she looked at them standing beside each other all dressed up.

Christopher got an uneasy feeling as he noticed John glaring at him from across the room, putting his guitar down.

"So you were asking Amber about me?" Ashley questioned him.

"Yeah, I saw you talking to her earlier. We are doing some shots on the beach here for a calender. If it's something you might want to try? I hope you don't mind me saying so, but you are a very beautiful woman and that could make you a lot of money."

"Maybe she don't mind, but I sure as hell do!" John stepped out from behind them.

"John!" Ashley hoped to stop him from showing his ass.

He was looking directly at this smug guy in a damn suit. "What the fuck is your problem? I already told you out on the balcony to get the fuck away from her!"

"Look you are misunderstanding what's going on here!" Christopher tried to explain.

"No I think I have you pegged right!" John snapped back at him. "You're trying to make a move on a chick that belongs to me!"

"John! Please stop! He's a photographer. He was talking to me about a job! That's all!"

"What kind of damn job?" A loud, drunken, messed up voice John yelled. Wondering what the hell this punk was up to.

"Look I'm a photographer. We shoot all over the world for different magazines and we are are going to take some photos on the shore here for a girls of New Jersey calendar."

"Well you are barking up the wrong damn tree here! In case you haven't figured it out, she ain't even from Jersey!" John yelled at this dude hoping to get rid of him.

"You mean the accent? Yeah, I can tell and it doesn't even matter. She has the look we want. She is the right body type. That's all."

John looked him in the eye. "Well she's my damn girl and I don't really want her in any fucking magazine showing off her body!" He turned to her. "Is this even something you would want to do? You told me earlier you didn't want any part of it!"

"Maybe I don't know. I was just trying to hear him out!"

"It's a good opportunity for her Johnny and if she gets signed she can make a good bit of money!" Amber chimed in.

"Just back off Amber, it's between me and her, you and this asshole don't have a say in it!"

Christopher spoke up. "No I believe it's totally up to the lady. I don't see a ring on her finger! It's her choice if she gets up close and personal with this opportunity!" He cut a look over at John.

"Well how would you like to get up close and personal with my fist?" John shot back glaring at him.